About Consent

All modalities I offer start with a conversation about consent, so that there will be full understanding between client and facilitator.

Consent is discussed along the lines that are set out by Dr. Betty Martin in the Wheel of Consent (link). Within the boundaries of consent the interactions of Allowing versus Taking and Serving versus Accepting define the sometimes subtle dynamics of relating, of mindful behaviour towards the other person. Outside of the boundaries of consent are the types of behaviour that we want to avoid because of the harmful nature of our shadow-sides.

Depending on the nature of the interaction of client and facilitator (is it a naked event with or without touch, or a massage) a checklist of attention points will be discussed for as far as relevant. Devised by Laurie Handlers (link), the acronym RBDSMT is used, which stands for:

• Relationship, what is your relationship status?

• Boundaries, which are they?

• Desires, what do you want?

• Sexual health, any worries?

• Meaning, how will it help you? 

• Trauma, any physical or mental points of consideration?

What applies to the dynamics between client and facilitator also has relevance to understanding behaviour and ingrained patterns of ourselves and how we relate with others. A worthwhile read is a blog by Andrew Barnes, discussing his Relationship Map (link).

This website contains a Code of Ethics and Conduct (link) that describes the way that I, as practitioner, and client or clients relate to each other, what both can expect and what responsibilities apply. This is especially important in fields, like treatments and events, where various degrees of nudity and touch are to be expected. The overriding purpose is to prevent misunderstandings or wrongful expectations between practitioner and client, in order to protect their integrity and safety. For this clear communication will be required, from both parties. Since I offer my session space for use by other practitioners the same applies to them and their clients. 

It is important to note that the practitioner understands that the agreed consent cannot and will not be expanded during the practice if the client would indicate that wish - in the spur of the moment; reducing the degree of consent however will be honoured at the client's wishes.